9 weeks 5 days

I had an ultrasound today and the baby is 9 weeks and 5 days old. Due the 4th September 2015. It always amazes me how active they are even at this early stage. The reason for this scan was purely I just wanted a sneak park of the baby. The GP I went to gave me a referral for a dating scan and I booked the appointment for now as it was halfway between the Fertility clinic ultrasound and my first appointment with my OB.

The woman doing the ultrasound asked me why I was having this ultrasound if I already knew my dates, and I told her my reasons, including the tiny bit of me that had a fear for another missed miscarriage and also the fact that we weren't planning on having the 12 weeks nuchal translucency ultrasound as I knew how inaccurate it can be, since my daughter was born healthy after being placed at high risk because of a high nuchal measurement. She told us we should still have the scan, which I thought was a bit rude at the time, but now I realise its probably because she was concerned with what she saw.

I asked her point blank about what looked to my like high nuchal fluid saying "that looks like my daughter, she had high nuchal fluid and it looks the same. My son didn't have it and I had a lot of ultrasounds that showed the same marker". She said it wasn't and was all normal. I guess she wasn't allowed to say it did look concerning, but it was annoying because I knew that  knew what I was talking about!

Needless to say, I felt pretty relaxed after the scan - as it wasn't like the specialist came flying into the room with my daughters ultrasound, so surely everything looked ok and we could enjoy a normal pregnancy.

That night we were planning on telling the kids the exciting news. I was just bursting for Mat to get home so we could show them the pictures and DVD of their sibling. About 15 minutes before Mat got home from work, I got a call from the ultrasound place. The specialist introduced herself - I knew it wasn't good - doctors don't call to say "congrats on your healthy baby". I said to her "please don't tell me there is bad news, although I know that is why you are ringing". She said I'm very sorry but this baby looks very similar to your first daughter, I have her notes from the file out too. This baby has an increased nuchal fluid and you need to talk to your obstetrician asap, I have already called him and let him know whats going on." I asked her if it was a bigger measurement than E's and she said "a little bit higher". I told her I thought I saw it on the ultrasound too. Im so shocked we are going to go through this journey again. It was terrifying last time and was not an enjoyable pregnancy as was filled with the unknown and fear. I had some hope though, as Ella turned out fine after everything we were warned about.

I hung up and got an appointment with my OB in 2 days time. I HATE WAITING! Everything about a high risk pregnancy is the waiting… hard enough for a patient person, which I am not.